Record: 13-24-2 (-12.5 units)
Recap:
Loser. I mean come on. I am not surprised but seriously how does this only last an inning. Are you kidding me? He hadn’t given up more than 6 runs all season and he gave up 7 in one fucking inning. Make this shit make sense. It was dead in the first inning. This guy had a lower line and it was dead in the first inning. You simply can’t make that up. He had been a solid and reliable starter for the White Sox all season and he got torched in the very first inning. I just can’t make it up. It is fucking shocking. I am putting curses on these fuckers that I am taking. They hit double after double after double after double and I was quickly dead. He was throwing shit right down the middle. It is so sad. What have I become? I am a fucking curse. I don’t know what I did to be such a terrible bettor. I am getting fucking crushed. My bankroll is seriously on its last legs. It is debilitating. I am fucked. I don’t know what is going on. Fuck. I am sorry I have nothing.
Lock: Seahawks/Patriots U44 1u to win 0.9u
Groundbreaking Analysis:
Please. Please. Please. We are here. There is NFL Football so it is a good day. We need a good day. It is a such a great day even with the NFL starting weirdly on a Wednesday. We are going to win. No questions. It’s an under. The Seahawks are a defensive minded team with a focus on offense and on not turning the ball over. They have gotten worse losing Walker and Charbonnet is injured. The Patriots had the second craziest offseason and we all know that every team that loses the Super Bowl is fucked the next year. I do not care that Brown is on the Patriots, I don’t see their offense doing much against this defense. They had a crazy offseason and they aren’t doing shit against this defense in Seattle. They obviously both played each other last so they know how to play each other on defense. Maye has to limit the turnovers after his embarrassment in the Super Bowl. Give me this under.
Unbiased Stats:
U44 in Patriots 4/L4
U44 in Seahawks 3/L5